The proudest moment I’ve had recently is actually starting this blog, for many reasons but mostly because it has forced me to get out of my comfort zone and put my thoughts on display for everyone to see. It opens me up to advise and criticism alike, which at times causes me anxiety but thankfully has been more rewarding than anything else. Its given me a platform to create and express myself freely without letting fear of judgment hold me back. That in itself, is an achievement in my eyes.
I’ve always enjoyed writing, it’s extremely relaxing and comes naturally to me but I never would have thought I’d have the courage to share my ideas publicly. Although, I don’t think I could have done it without the confidence 1 or 2 of friends gave me to try something new when I was contemplating writting this blog. It’s a work in progress, and even though it’s still in the beginning stages, I’m proud that I’ve come this far. 😊✊
I actually don’t know what my dream job is. I do know that it would involve traveling, writing, and adventure! I’d love to be my own boss and have the freedom to choose my availability and price tag, something that doesn’t require a monotonous routine but rather offers variety and excitement.
Even though I strive to be my own boss, if I ever have the opportunity to work for the TV network Viceland [Vice] as a journalist or anything similar, I would take it in a heart beat. I support what they represent and are trying to expand on, which to me is acceptance and unity. Most of their programing is very forward in thinking, as well as bold and not to mention at times taboo. For those reasons among a few others, It would be a dream come true to have the chance to incorporate my creativity and ideas to their already fast growing movement. One day.
I came across a few blogging challenges and figured it would be a good fun way to start my creative juices flowing… not to mention, get to know myself a little better in the process. Ehhh, let’s give it a try, why not?? I’ve found it difficult to set aside time to write so I’ve decided to make creating the habit a priority, as well as working on being more consistent no matter how “busy” I may be. My goal is to have written and posted a blog by the end of each day. Stay tuned 😄.
DAY 1: Real life and Stuff 🕉
When I decided I wanted to give blogging a chance I really had no idea what I wanted to write about, where to gear it towards, and to be completely honest I still don’t. I just know both then and now, that I enjoy writing and wanted to express myself, and my perspective on what’s happening around me. I also wanted to be as authentic as possible with my opinion regardless the topic being discussed.
I graduated HS early, I was 17 and had absolutely no direction. I was given a grant to continue school, but I hadn’t given my post graduation plans much thought. I was just going to kind of let life happen and see where it took me. That same year a few days after my birthday my brother passed away, I was devistated. I didn’t know what I wanted to do with my life, not even a clue. To keep my mind busy, go along with social norms, and do what was expected of me, I did what everyone else was doing. I continued schooling and enrolled at the local community college. Two years flew by and I still had no direction, my “plan” soon backfired. With only one semester shy of graduating with an Associates degree, I stopped going to class, it seemed like a waste of time then.
While I was there I took a philosophy class that began churning the wheels on my spiritual journey. I had to write an essay answering the question: Do you believe in predestination or free will? Since I grew up in a very religious household this was a tough question for me to answer because I was taught everything was “according to Gods plan” but how could this be if we have free will? I had never even really thought of its implications. I wrote the paper and when I got it back the professor commented that I had not given him my opinion, I had just defined both but I had not made a clear distinction as to which I believed in. I kept that question in mind for years, and I’m still in the search for a satisfying answer that blends both views. What I have until now is that I believe God gave us the tools we need to succeed in life but it’s left to our free will on how or what we choose to use them and ultimately our purpose or our destiny to pursue what we love and share our love (gift) with the world.
After I became interested in joining the Peace Corp, and for a bit I thought I might have found my niche, and is the reason why I began jotting my thoughts down. A friend of mine found a green journal with a pink peace sign on the cover, and gifted it to me. It was intended for me to record my adventures in the Peace Corp. I loved it. However, I soon came to the realization that I had not yet developed any particular skill or trade that could actually be beneficial to my peers and ended up not going. Although, I did take up journaling from then on, and have kept it up for 5 yrs now. In retrospect I was just searching to help, to be a part of something, to have a purpose and maybe pick up some discipline and excitement along the way.
For as long as I’ve had the journals I never went back and read them, it was like after I wrote an entry I had some where to store my weird memory and didn’t have to think or talk about ever again. I thought about it and why not share my experiences instead and maybe even get a good laugh, after all our most outrageous moments are also a part of what makes us who we are as well as lovable and unique. So, with this blog I wanted to celebrate the everyday unsung battles most of us go through but often don’t have anywhere to vent or feel as if nobody could possibly understand or relate to. Life in its real, raw moments. Real life and stuff inall its glory.It’s short, simple, and to the point …kind of like me.
“Show us where your heart is”- Is a near impossible task for me to try and portray with only a few words and images. My heart is scattered throughout space and time, I couldn’t settle on only one place.
I can however show you one of my favorite local places, where a piece of my heart currently and has for many years resided. A place I’ve called home for no better reason other than it knows me as well as I know it. I was born in a remote area in Mexico, in Michoacan, to be a little more exact, but Ennis, and all its nooks and crannies have seen me grow up and unknowingly assisted in shaping who I am today. I’ve always gravitated to this place in particular, since the first time a couple friends and I stumbled upon it. Its been a sort of safe haven, my quite place when I need solitude, or just want to be unbother for a moment. It seems to be hidden in between country back roads and takes a bit of a hike to get there, but the effort is well worth the warm comfort it brings. Whether I visit by myself or with friends, it always offers the same unwinding stillness I crave. Its simplicity has always called my name and been part of its charm, my local getaway never too far from reach.
Everything about it has a calming feel. Maybe it’s just me and my bias opinion, but even the isolated trail leading to the bank has a certain presence, a relaxed undertone that’s begging for you to join.
Even with its simplicity its offered solice and helped create beautiful memories, ideas, and conversations all of which I hold near and dear to my heart. No bells or whistles, nothing too fancy and honestly I wouldn’t want it any other way.